I remember, when I was about 8 or 9, my parents got a divorce and my pops "moved" out of the house. Technically, my mom threw him out, because she caught him cheating....I think. I knew he was cheating, but I'm not quite sure if THAT was the reason they finally divorced. What I do know, is that he was paying the mortgage on the house and those payments stopped once he was no longer living there.
My mom wasn't used to paying ALL the bills on her own, not to mention being a single mother of 2. Naturally, we were evicted from our home despite my grandma sending us what money she could. Now that I think about it, we were evicted pretty quick so we were probably already behind on the mortgage.
So here we were, my mom, little sister and I, with no place to go. In St.Louis, there are plenty of vacant houses (vaco) to squat in. My mom had the clever idea of packing everything up and "acting" like we were moving out. After that, we just squatted in our own house. Surprisingly, that worked and it took the bank a long ass time to officially remove is from the premises. We eventually found a way cheaper house in a way cheaper neighborhood. We were technically homeless, if only for a short period of time.
Lately, I've been thinking about becoming homeless (temporarily) once again. I take my financial growth very seriously and the main resource I need to acquire the kind of wealth I want is retaining more of my cash. I've already cut my spending to just the basics, got a promotion at work and moved some money around to take out half of my debt all at once. Even with all of that, I could still use more cash flow. The only unnecessary expense I have yet to cut is my rent.
As a truck driver, I'm rarely home. After doing the math, I calculated that I only spend between 4-5 days at home in the average month. My rent is about $800/mo and is about to rise, because I haven't renewed my lease. All of my monthly expenses add up to about $2000/mo. After all my expenses are paid, I have very little disposable income left. That's means I've been spending almost 40% of my income on something I only utilize 16% of the year. That math was all I needed to make my decision.
As soon as I can end my current lease, I'm getting rid of my apartment and putting all my things in storage. I've been playing around with the idea of being "voluntarily homeless" for awhile, but I kept making excuses not to pull the trigger. The main cons with being "voluntarily homeless" is that I'd have to reroute my mail and I'd no longer have a bachelor pad to go back to when I wasn't on the road. After weighing the pros and cons, the only thing I had to do was get over the fear of being uncomfortable. Even though I had technically been homeless before, I still had a place to call "home."
At this point in my life, I don't have the luxury of time on my side. Whenever an opportunity presents itself, I have to jump on it immediately. This is my chance to completely get out of debt and start investing my money. Since this is voluntary, I'll always have the option to change my mind, so my risks are minimum. I'll make a follow-up post and keep all you guys updated.
Should men be allowed to hit women? This has been a question I've seen/heard a lot growing up and even still today on social media. It's obviously phrased in a way that immediately implies that a man physically harming a woman is taboo. However, if you rephrase the question, you get a less biased inquiry. The question should be, "Should you be allowed to hit someone in self-defense?"
Why do I structure the question this way? It alleviates the need for a complicated answer. The proper answer is either a "Yes" or a "No." There will always be those difficult people who say "Well, it depends on...." Fuck those people. Most people would answer, "Yes" and I would just beat the shit out of anyone who answered "No" all the while reminding them of their answer.
Now that we have set a moral foundation, we can go into specific scenarios. As to not stray too far away from the gender issue from the original question; let's start there. Should a man be allowed to hit a woman in self-defense? I say fuck yeah if it's in self-defense. No one would argue that a woman shouldn't be able to fight back if attacked by a man, so I see no reason why it would be any different if the roles were reversed.
The main arguments I hear are:
1. Men are stronger than women.
So. If anything, that should deter women from initiating altercations with men. Additionally, not every man is stronger than every woman. Also, the attacker normally has ample time to size up their victim before approaching them. If a woman plans on losing a 1-on-1 fight, she is likely to bring a weapon.
2. A woman's attacks won't hurt a man.
Bullshit. I've seen children beat up adults. If that's possible, why would it seem farfetched for a grown ass woman to hurt a grown ass man. Every human has vulnerable spots. It doesn't matter who hits those spots; it's going to hurt regardless.
3. Real men don't hit women.
I'm not even sure how this is a valid argument. I won't get into the definition of a "real man," because I spoke about it in another post. This statement implies that men who don't consider themselves "real men" by female standards are allowed to hit women just as another woman would. So if I renounce my manhood and identify as a woman, I'm allowed to fight women without persecution? That kind of opens the door for men to say a "real woman" would never attack a man. Therefore, if I defend myself against a female attacker, it's OK to beat her as if she was a man, because she isn't a "real woman."
4. Men can just walk away.
Really? To the women that read my blog, are you seriously telling me that if you attacked a man he could casually walk away from the situation unscathed? This sounds like some dumb ass advice a clueless mom gives to her kid who is getting bullied at school. You CAN NOT walk away from someone who is determined to fight you.
5. You wouldn't want a man to put his hands on your mother, sister, daughter, girlfriend etc.
First off, you shouldn't want anyone you know to get into a fight. Second, if I witness any of the females in my life START a fight with a man and end up losing, then they just have to take that ass whoopin. I might step in if it looks like they'll die. Otherwise, I'll respect the art of 1-on-1 fighting. You shouldn't start a fight with a man expecting another man to bail you out if you end up losing. You take that much deserved ass whooping like the grown independent woman you are.
In conclusion, I only advocate violence if it is in self-defense, specifically in the prevention of one's own bodily harm whether it be against a man or a woman. I also advocate violence as an immediate form of retaliation to a prior violent act. The law of the land will forever be "An eye for an eye." You hit me; I hit you back. Playground rules, bitch.