I see too many people doing dirt in the dumbest of ways. What I mean by this is I notice people doing things they know they shouldn't be doing, but they go about it in an illogical way. There are precautions that must be taken while doing wrong. There are also a few rules that should be followed.
1. Don't be obvious.
If you are doing something wrong and are attempting to not get caught, then it's needless to say don't make your intentions known. For example, if you plan on stealing something in a store, then don't hover around it while staring at the cashier. You look suspicious as fuck.
Most thieves spot what they want to steal then avoid going near it until they are sure no one is watching them. Store owners are aware of this, which is why they are suspicious of people (mainly teenagers and minorities) that walk around the store too long with buying anything.
The best way to steal from a store is the direct approach. Just walk in, grab it and walk out. Usually, this works best after scouting. You visit the store once or twice to learn the layout, see if there are any cameras and take note of busy hours. Then you come back, grab and go.
2. Make sure it's worth the risk.
This is pretty self explanatory. Sometimes you have to take the good with the bad. You win some and you lose some. You've heard it all. Just make sure your wins outweigh your losses. I'm not talking success rate. I'm saying you have to know whether or not the punishment of getting caught is worth whatever it is you are doing. Do the pros of your actions outweigh the cons? Do you stand to gain more than you stand to lose?
For example, when I was in college, niggas used to steal each other's game systems and laptops . (Xbox, Playstation) If you were caught doing this, the worst case scenarios are getting kicked out of school or fighting the nigga whose shit you stole.
A high end gaming console/laptop is worth $500- $1000 on average. You could easily sell these things and make a couple hundred dollars. If you spend a lot of time robbing niggas, then you probably don't care too much about getting a degree. Plus getting kicked out of one college won't stop you from attending another one. Also, my school was small enough to know whose shit you were stealing, so you knew ahead of time whether or not you could beat that person in a fight. The risks are fairly low compared to the reward.
Let's change the scenario a little bit. Let's say you want to steal the same product, but new. So you decide to steal a system/laptop from a Best Buy. Now the risks are a lot higher. If you get caught here, they are more than likely pressing charges. And stealing that type of product is going to get you a grand larceny offense. You're doing a couple years in jail, paying a few grand in fines or both. This time, the deed isn't worth the risk at all.
3. Timing is everything.
You can commit any crime or wrong doing and get away with it as long as it's done at the right time. In life, timing makes a huge difference in every decision you make.
Perfect example. My favorite word is "bitch." I can call my homeboys bitches all day cause we have that kind of relationship, but I can't do the same to my female friends (or any female) without getting cursed out or beat the fuck up. However, there was a small period of time when I could call anyone a bitch.
If you are older than 10 then I'm sure you remember the Chappelle Show. One of their most iconic episodes was the Rick James episode. The premise was Charlie Murphy sharing stories of how he used to hang out with Rick James, who was played by Dave Chappelle in a flashback sketch. The most memorable line from that episode was "I'm Rick James, bitch." For the next month, I could call anyone a bitch as long as I claimed my name was Rick James, first.
4. Have a backup plan if caught.
Obviously, the goal is to get away with something wrong without being caught, but there is always a chance that things don't go as smoothly as you planned. This is when you need to have a backup plan.
A backup plan can be something as simple as a lie you can tell to help you escape punishment. The funny thing is most people can tell you are lying, but if it's a good enough lie they'll be too afraid to call you on your bullshit. The one thing people hate more than liars is that awkward embarrassment they feel when they've accused someone of lying then later find out that person telling the truth.
For example, a buddy and I were out so late the sun started rising. We were broke and starving so we decided to drive to the closest hotel and help ourselves to a free continental breakfast. We got inside and could smell the food, but couldn't see it. We made the mistake of going to a nice hotel, so us being the only two niggas there kind of made us stand out.
One of the managers approached us and asked what we were doing there. For some reason my mind went completely blank. My homeboy told him we were interested in working there and we needed applications. (Damn, that was a perfect lie.) We actually did need jobs at this time and we definitely looked unemployed. He gave us 2 applications and we left.
5. Don't get cocky/sloppy.
After a little practice/luck you'll become quite successful at pulling off these stunts, but don't become too arrogant. The day you get cocky is the day you get caught. And it's not going to be because of karma. It'll be because you made a rookie mistake. When you become full of yourself you'll start to make mistakes you normally wouldn't make. You overlook certain things.
Cheating, for example. Not to sound arrogant, but I've successfully cheated on too many girls to count. However when you do it as much as I have, you are bound to get caught eventually. I remember one instance especially, because it could have been easily avoided. It was clearly a rookie mistake. A few of them, actually.
As usual, I had a chick hanging out at my crib. We just finished fucking and I had to go to the bathroom. First rookie mistake, was leaving my phone in the room. Second rookie mistake, was not having a lock on my phone. Third rookie mistake, was not clearing all call logs and text messages before she came over. At the time I had roommates, so when I left the bathroom I chatted with them for a few minutes. That was my fourth rookie mistake; not coming back in the room quick enough.
Of course, she couldn't help but go through my phone. Especially after I made it so easy for her. It had been a while since I was last caught up, so I was feeling invincible. Then it all came crashing down because I got careless. Remember, always keep your guard up no matter how good you are.
6. Be confident/oblivious.
This may sound contradictory to the last rule, but let me clarify what I'm saying. I'm saying you should commit to your actions. Whatever you are doing should come off as natural. So natural that it seems like you are completely oblivious to any wrong being done.
For example, years ago I was in a McDonald's. It was really busy and the cashiers were just taking people's names and writing it on their orders. When your order was ready, they would yell your name and set your food on the counter. I was waiting in the back of the line to order when I noticed a guy make an order then immediately go to the restroom. They called his name, I walked to the counter, grabbed his bag, said thank you and walked right out. No hesitation at all.
7. Don't snitch on yourself.
This should go without saying, but people talk too fucking much. If you do something and get away with it, shut up and be grateful. Don't go around bragging to your friends. You especially, don't brag to strangers. You never know who knows who. The only time telling on yourself is ok, is if there is no possible way it could come back to bite you in the ass.
For example, as a rapper, I sometimes rap about my life. But you'll never hear me rap about some shit that I did that could possibly be used against me in court. The only time I might even consider doing something like that is if I'm past the statute of limitations or I'm on my death bed.
This will be the home of my random thoughts until you really do know the MuffynMan.